Faith

Bigger Than Us

GAIA, touring artwork by UK artist Luke Jerram as displayed in Exeter, ON

I feel so blessed to have been able to visit this GAIA exhibit. It’s an extraordinary to-scale replica of the Earth, which has been suspended from the ceiling of Trivitt Memorial Church in Exeter, Ontario as part of the ‘Huron Waves Music Festival’ during the town’s 150ieth anniversary.

The resin sculpture is lit from the inside and slowly turns to the sound of ethereal music, the actual voices of astronauts in spacecrafts as they experience the real thing, and the artists rendition of the mysterious sounds of the universe.

I think the emptied out sanctuary of a large Church is THE PERFECT PLACE to display it. 

When you LOOK UP, the peaked nave (above where the congregation would sit) of the church is reminiscent of the inside of the bottom of a LARGE BOAT. It made me think of Noah’s Ark and God’s promises of eternal love and protection. Here, the Ark domes over the delicate, breathtaking earth, like a rainbow, suggesting to me the everlasting presence of God holding our tiny planet in the enormity of space.


The narrow carpet which us usually the sanctuary aisle, forms a line extending from the earth to the BAPTISMAL FONT, which marks the exact distance the earth is from the moon. Viewers behold the planet just as astronauts have really viewed it from the moon.

Standing there brought feelings of humility and awe. The planet is astoundingly beautiful, and when you think about it realistically, in all its beauty, it is terrifyingly small in the vastness of the known universe.

I think it is very FITTING that the FONT is placed as the spacer for the MOON. The baptismal font represents the cleansing work of God’s Spirit that is forever guiding and accompanying us like the steadfastness of the moon.  As the MOON reflects the light of the SUN on the EARTH through the night, WE reflect the brightness of GOD’S LOVE for all creation through the indwelling of Christ’s SPIRIT. 

I doubt any of this was considered in the setup, but it certainly preached to me!


I will treasure the photos taken, especially of me in communion with earth. We must REMEMBER our God-given RESPONSIBILITY of stewardship for the sake of the environment and the SACRED BALANCE humans so thoughtlessly damage.

Moody Mess

😊😬😐😔😪😶

At my monthly check in with my psychiatrist, I told him that my mood has actually been OKAY for a while. It WAS true. I saw him while I was still riding a wave of adrenaline after a surprisingly positive weekend among the people of the church I minister to. 

With all my mood and personality disorders and my frequent depression, it is really something when I wholeheartedly feel hope, love  and connection with them. Having a good, relaxed time socially is always a challenge. But I was feeling it.

Maybe it’s because my ‘Mommy senses’ tingled when I held the new grandson of parishioners who are integral to our faith family. A measure of their joy rubbed off on me and I am still so thankful.

Yeah!  I held a perfect bundle of baby in my arms! I have longed for the pre-pandemic ease in which our interactions with the most vulnerable among us were not blanketed in fear. What a gift to count his tiny fingers and toes, to feel the warmth and weight of him and to marvel, to bask in the created perfection on my lap! God is good.

This was at a summer social so graciously hosted by members at their home.  The sound of the giant Jenga blocks falling, the giggles echoing, the joy and exuberance of the children diving, somersaulting, and splashing in the pool.  The watery trails of drips that followed them to their towels and snacks was nostalgic of when my own kids were small.  I found it deeply satisfying to witness.

Sitting together with leisurely chatting, roasting marshmallows singing together around a fire, not to mention the perfect weather was just fantastic! God is good.

The next day followed with our Cemetery Decoration service. I was overcome by the turnout and hospitality shown to the bereaved. The mingling of relaxed laughter and vulnerable,  unhidden tears was breathtaking.

How the sun, the breeze, the great outdoors, so comfortably provided us with a fittingly natural cathedral to do the work of remembering together. We stood on the holy ground of grief and faith together. Our church family graciously helping one another, teaming up to unpack an unrehearsed, gorgeously human service full of organic, heart felt love and tenderness. God is good.

So WHY, as I rode to my appointment did that familiar nagging ache of sadness and hopelessness clutch at my gut?  Believing in God’s love for me and the goodness so evident around me DOES NOT fix my mental health.

It’s weird, but after each high, I seem to go right into a low. I came home from that appointment and sucked back my extra pills that are designed to curb the nagging feeling.

It doesn’t negate the wonderful feelings of the weekend but it does stir up anger and questions I’d rather not dwell on.

Onward and upward.

You’re not alone.

, ,

Being

Favorite camping spot.

How important is spirituality in your life?

My spirituality is informed by my Christianity. However, you can easily be spiritual without being religious. I think it’s all about how we interpret our awareness of BEING.

I live and breathe my personal spirituality. It fuels my interpersonal relationships, my worldview, my faith, and my pastoral ministry. I believe in a Greater Power, the Uncreated Source of everything, a consciousness of something bigger than all of us. As a Christian, I’m referring to my God. The awareness of goodness, love, intrinsic worth, purpose, and eternity enacted in and through daily life is my spiritual goal.

My soul is always seeking the eternal who IS LOVE, who loves me. The energy, the supernatural vibration, the divine in me, my Godspark, keeps me constantly and eternally connected to God/the Source/ the All-Knowing and everything else that is also in energetic union through life and in death.

It’s important. Spirituality is my life’s purpose. Connection and unity is its desire. Spirituality makes me care about people, other creatures, and the environment. It drives me to seek kindness and justice in this world of pain. It helps me to act with humility and notice all the amazing things I’d miss if my mind wasn’t always head to head with God.